For the past month and since I have been blogging more; I have been putting an entry than researching it. My focus for this week is “Emotional Growth”. I have it written in my planner along with some of the notes I have taken throughout the week. I’m reminded of last month’s post on purposes for my life and I want to go over them again.
The Passion and Purpose of having a meaningful and creative life with My Lord & Savior, My Group, and My Family.
The Purpose of Showing Up for Myself and taking care of what I need daily.
The Reasons to seek help and Get things right by accepting my mental disorders and being active with self care.
The Purpose of being there for the people that mean the most to me and being a pleasure to be around.
The call to write passionately and purposefully on a regular basis and not hide away or get defensive about what people think about me.
I’m sitting outside again smoking my second cigarette before I go inside and I am going with my new caseworker today at 1:30PM. I transferred $10 into my Chime account from my Venmo; and have $15 in both accounts. Financially; I wish I was doing better and had more money to save and spend. There’s been rumors of being able too work around here at The Lions Center but nothing has happened to earn any extra money. Their looking into changing us to another location but it hasn’t happened yet.
I’m feeling disappointed in the fact that I don’t have a career; as I know that Student Loans are due on August 31st. I should have finished my degree in Advertising and Public Relations and I am being hard on myself about dropping out. If money were not a problem I would find a way to finish. I’m finally recovering from so much self pity and I am starting to like myself more and enjoying my own company.
When will I learn to be on my own? I’m finally getting over the pain of the past and a few caregivers have given me hope that one day I will be successful on my own. I know that I am also feeling some fear, frustration, and pain as I learn and gain the skills and knowledge to move forward in life.
How Do I Really Start Focusing On Self Growth & Starting To Accomplish All I Set Out In Life To Do?