Tell Me Tuesday

​I am at the center and didn’t receive my medication this morning. The lady in charge of the center, picked us up before our caregiver arrived to give us our medication. I have one more pack of cigarettes from what my dad gave me this weekend. It’s important to tell the truth and do our best to abide by the truth. I helped pass out bowls of oatmeal to the people at the center.

In the past, I have worked in restaurants as a waitress. I have worked at Casa Ole in Lake Charles, Louisiana. Hauffbraugh’s and Cheddars in Arlington, Texas. That was a long time ago and it didn’t last long. I am good at following directions for the most part but I found myself liking retail better. 

I have been reading a lot of articles about writing and starting an art business. My son was so precious as he said his first goal for our Art Shop, is to make $300. Although I have started an online Entrepreneur Facebook Page that I have had up since 2010. I haven’t had to much success with it. 

When I started blogging I also wanted to make money. I had JohnnaFloyd.com open for as long as I could. Financial I was unable to reopen the domain this year. I make about $125, a month. I hated to get my hopes up only to find out I wasn’t making any progress.

I’m fortunate for everything in my life and I know that God is moving to work some great things out for us. Through hard things like not being able to receive medication this morning to seeing how blessed I am to have a good nights sleep and having a second cup of coffee this morning. The truth is that it’s easier said than done; we have to prepare, plan, and set goals in order to make our lives better.

In the book “The Night Portrait”; a reoccurring theme is that life would not be worth living if it wasn’t for Art. I brought my backpack full of Art Supplies and I have only had inspiration to make a few drawings since the beginning of the year. I know I have a lot of free time to work on creative things but filling a blank page is calling for more creativity than I have right now.

We all go through hard things in life and when I think of the things that are impacting me the most, it’s my depression and being idle instead of productive. Suggestions are given but sometimes we would rather someone ask or even demand something of us, instead of carelessly wasting away the day. 

The Truth is I wish I were more successful and more put together. I’m reminded while reading my Bible Studies, that nothing is a waste. I may not be a hundred percent on my abilities right now but through hard work and dedication I have learned that being a better self is a never ending cycle and the more you don’t give up the better it gets.

As someone who has given up on the group home five times and am still here. I have learned that I can’t force anything to happen and to place it in Gods Hands. 

Chores & Organizing

When I was told we we're leaving the center, I was excited to be coming home to learn a little more on my actual laptop. As soon as I walked in the house my caregiver started talking about how I better clean and organize my room. I know that I can't afford to buy a pricey domain right now and that "BlogSpot" will have to work for me. I desire to make an income but first I need to sit down and do research. First, to vacuum my room. The temperature is so hot in here and I first want to work on how I am doing and feeling. 

I feel irritated and happy at the same time. I need to learn how to make some more income through the use of the internet. I'm watching a Stephen Gardner video about what is going on in the Nation right now. I've had two of my Co-Vid19 Vaccines and I'm glad no one I know has it. 

I have an assortment of books... I carried my backpack today to "The Center"; in my backpack I have my new TomBow Markers, SketchBook, Zebra MidLiner Brush Pens, Erasers, Crayola Colored Pencils, An AOA pouch with more colored pencils and sharpeners, My Planner, Art Therapy Coloring book, Marker Paper, Hello Kitty Wellness Planner, and another AOA pouch with my Papermate candy felt pens and markers.

 

Work Is Over

​Actually work, literally never ends. Although I bring my backpack to the center every day. I have become stale in my artwork of drawing, painting, and photography. I’m enjoying writing as inspiration comes to me. For most of the week my backpack has sat on the ground and I haven’t been using it I'm much more on my iPhone to pass the time. I did make a bracelet today! When in a creative rut and needing to pass the time, I have been less than productive. Seems most of the time I am smoking and feeling a deep dark depression. I have read several articles on Pinterest about Creativity. I'm hoping that Biden has some way to help us with Financial Aid for Student Loans. I am a Public Relations and Advertising major; lacking five to seven classes before I can officially graduate. 

We had an awesome dinner of ribs, rice, and beans. Cooked by our lovely caregiver tonight. I don’t know how to cook and really missed out on that in my life. Took my medicine and have enjoyed sitting outside to smoke for a while before and after dinner. I'm listening to relaxing music at the moment and working on my blog. Thinking of what I can really sit or lay here writing about. Next weekend is Mother's day and I remember my little boy telling me he didn't want me to come over. Though my parents we're nice and said that I am. It must be the age that he's at; hopefully this won't last forever with him having hurt feelings towards me. I try to be sweet and nice most of the time. When I can't be I resort to closing myself off so I don't hurt anyone.

I received my “Cinder” book back from a house member. The book is a good one and it’s about a twist on Cinderella but she is a cyborg. Meanwhile; there's this horrible plague that is all over the country of China. The next book I am reading is “The Night Portrait” by Laura Morelli. Although I have started this book and am only a tenth of the way through.  

There’s not too much they ask of us to do around the group home. To wake up around 8AM and make the bed. Rent was due today and my father paid my rent. I am appreciative that my rent was paid and look forward to another month here. Although there is no light on in my room and I need my lamp in order to read anything other than my laptop or my phone. It's time for another smoke!

Finally It’s Friday

​Woke up at 5:45AM… I am happy today is Friday and it’s the end of the week. We’re sitting here at the table drinking coffee and waiting for our caregiver to arrive.

7:51AM; took my medicine and went outside to smoke two cigarettes. This morning my roommate said I was a great writer. I’m waiting for our day care worker to arrive. 

I would like to write more, so I’m focusing on what my niche should be at first I thought I wanted to write about relationships, my career, having an online community, and living at the group home. I realize I have written a lot about my day to day life.

My Relationships

Having mutual respect is important and I don’t want to post names. Confidentiality is important and it’s better to be safe than sorry. I am watching the news and reading blogs on my Relationships Board on Pinterest. 

My Career

I don’t have to focus on the negative and there are still steps I can take to have a good career. I went to college for Public Relations & Advertising; and want to do something with my dropping out. Hopefully there will be a way for me to still be successful. I have posted a few pages with my artwork on them. Our day care worker just texted that she wasn’t picking us up today.