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Friday, June 10, 2022

Focus For Friday

​Financial Freedom is such a blessing and hopefully an attainable goal I can reach in the future. When not doing good financially; I feel selfish for asking for more. I needed to take a shower but I don’t have any shampoo and the shower is filthy. There are five things I need on a weekly basis; toilet paper, coffee, cigarettes, tide pods, and soda. That’s what I buy every week; things are getting so expensive and I need a way to make some more money.

The new caregiver is here and I took my medicine and smoked a cigarette. Since waking up at 5:45AM, I have smoked six cigarettes and just received my five house cigarettes. I am grateful and even though I am doing the best I can I am needing to do better. I have a counseling appointment this afternoon. The new caregiver is making a pitcher of coffee and my ride to the center said she would be here by 8:30AM.


I talked to my dad yesterday and asked him if he would buy me a carton of Lucky πŸ€ Strikes. He did; then I texted him and said I would rather have my $25 a week. I was hesitant this morning and didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. He’s taking me out for breakfast tomorrow morning at “Skillet & Dinner” and then we’re going to “Luxor’s Vape Shop”. My dad is very supportive and helpful but never mistake kindness for weakness.


It’s especially important I don’t become a burden on my parents and I am grateful for everything they do for me. The lady in charge of the center picked me up and we arrived at the center at 9:25AM; as she was arriving the elderly housemate who has been here for a while had thrown my phone and was told she would have to find somewhere else to live.

I’m eating breakfast; grits and sausage. Drinking a cup of third cup of coffee and sitting at a table. Despite having a pretty difficult morning and not being able to take a shower. I’m determined to make it a good day and looking forward to my counseling appointment and seeing my dad tomorrow morning.

Although; I haven’t worked in over ten years and my weekly pay has gotten cut in half since the beginning of the year. I know I will be taken care of and things will be alright. I told my father that I have too much stuff in my room and that the house owner is tired of me having a lot of junk in my room. I am focusing on work habits and finding motivation from Pinterest articles; as time progresses I need to be able too show up for myself and work on my future self.

I received my second cup of coffee and am needing help to fill out the rest of my PSY form. There’s several things I can do to make today and the future better and counseling will help. The things I found are; to love myself, use positive self talk, creating and maintaining healthy habits, practicing gratitude, learning new things, mastering my time, making connections, conquering fears, being consistent, finding or renewing faith, and investing in the future.


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